I miss making music. Really, I do. I don't mean just recording and writing alone, I mean the full band dynamic. I miss singing. I miss performing. I miss those 3am diner runs after a show to eat breakfast food for dinner. It was fun to play bass and guitar and even drum in some of the other bands I've been a part of, but nothing was as fun as singing in Evil Adam.
I've recorded material with other people for other projects, written with other people as a band for some defunct stuff, and went absolutely apeshit with my cousin Joe in our project Cousin, but nothing has really taken me to the hilt with live performances like Evil Adam did and I'm starting to feel like nothing ever will again. I'm tempted to just try to find my way into a band that is already formed, only filling the lead singer spot, but at the same time I really would just like to have Evil Adam kicking ass like we were back in 2000. We were playing regularly, had a decent sized fan base and even had some industry contacts, even if they turned out to lead nowhere. The creative juices were in constant flow, live shows were fun, interesting, and gratifying, and I just felt like I was able to showcase my creative muscle in a way that didn't make me feel like I was being underused or ignored.
I have a lot of plans for Evil Adam next year, and really, this year is too crazy for me to even try to put much effort, money, and time into getting a live act for Evil Adam back into the grind, but I'm wondering if it really is the best thing for me. Should I just be part of something else, start something new, keep Evil Adam a recording only thing, or what? I know no matter what I do I must be part of something performance oriented. I have lots of interests, goals, and wants but how many of them are really all that attainable? At what point am I just spreading myself too thin or getting my creative hopes up? It sucks to have so many questions for myself and really no answers. I feel like I know exactly what I want to do but I won't let myself do it by wanting to do to many things or things that are just too big for me to handle. Let's take a look, shall we?
1) Evil Adam
a] Recording: write and record BRAND NEW music, finish "The Root of All Evil" and market/sell it, get press for it, whore it on the internet
b] Videos: Get music videos done for "The Root of All Evil" and have contests for fan made stuff
c] Licensing: Get Evil Adam music in films, video games, etc.
d] Website: Get a new Evil Adam site going. I have a new blog and message board, thankfully, but the rest needs to be updated.
e] Merch: T-Shirts from a non-shitty non-expensive company are a must. Anything else is icing on the evil cake.
2)
Cousina] Recording: Write and record BRAND NEW music with Joe, finish "The Optimus Primo LP" and re-master the tracks that were on "The Bootydust EP" for it.
b] Videos: Same as Evil Adam
c] Licensing: Same as Evil Adam
d] Website: Now that
http://www.bootydust.com/ is live I need to expand it, flesh it out, get Joe to post to it more, and all around grow everything around it.
e] Merch: Same as Evil Adam and then some. I think Cousin has the capability of being way more popular than Evil Adam for multiple reasons.
3] Other Music Projects
a] I've already agreed to writing a bunch of new music with John D. and Jay Curcio for an indie wrestling company but we need a place to do it and equipment to record it to. Otherwise we can't fucking start this goddamn project soon enough!
b] I want to make custom music for movies and video games that also fall outside of Evil Adam and Cousin. Any takers?
4) Movies/Video
a] I want to get some movie scripts done, finalized, and filmed. I have so many ideas, I just have to get them done!
b] I want to direct. I've watched enough shit to have a decent eye for visual media in motion, I just need the time and capability of such.
c] I know I can edit video, I've done it before. Do I really want to do all of this for my own stuff though?
d] I would love to help create and direct music videos for the bands that I also am friends with. That is a lot of you guys out there!
e] I want to act again. I was pretty good at it and it was a lot of fun.
5) Books/Stories
a] I started writing a novel years ago, and the idea grew out of control and too big for me to finish. I need to reign it in and finish it.
b] I eventually want to make a collection of short stories, prose, lyrics, poetry, and other random shit I have written over the years and just get it published. I don't care if anyone buys it as long as I can own a copy that is binded, has a real fucking book cover, and exists.
c] I have about 20 short stories that aren't short enough and thus aren't finished. They might develop into bigger stories/books but I just don't have the drive in me to get them done yet. What will it take?
d] My brain never stops coming up with ideas for things and really my first thought is that I need to become a comic book writer. 4 color art is probably the best format to take my long-winded, episodic, narrative style to, however I don't know anyone that would draw them for me. I can't draw. I want to write comics. Help, please?
6) Video Games
a] This is probably the most difficult thing to get done but I would love to design video games, but only in the realm of game play mechanics and story. I can't program and I can't draw. Yeah, sucks to be me, eh?
So there you have it. What am I to do? Anyone out there have any ideas or avenues for me to get some of this done? Anyone want to team up on some of these or know someone who can help?
Aye, either way, my brain is never idle but my hands always seem to be. I'm in a great relationship that will be 100% official in October and I feel like I have nothing to offer my future wife except love. Sure, that is the most important thing but I wish I could make her proud as well, and hell, I'd love to be proud of myself.
Labels: books, cousin, evil adam, movies, music, video games, videos
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